Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The greiving process sucks...

It's been about a week since Tasha left us. What a rough week it has been.


Over the weekend, I went through all of our digital photos and made a Tasha file. While looking through it, it really covered everything - from being a puppy to pitcures I took just recently. It was really nice to look at - and will continue to look at.


Over the weekend, came the unpleasant task of getting rid of her personal effects. That was extremely hard, but I wanted to get it done - I didn't want to see things and keep coming across them. The dynamics of the kitchen have changed - her water and food bowl is no longer by the dishwasher, her treat jar is no longer on the counter next to the paper towels. It just seems real empty - kind of the way I feel.


The hardest part for me is the routine - or actually adjusting to a new routine. She is no longer laying in the middle of the kitchen floor as I'm making dinner; she is no longer watching me cook breakfast - while waiting for hers; coming home from work is very hard since PJ doesn't get home for an hour after I get home - she is no longer sitting at the front window. I always gave her a little piece of whatever I just ate in her bowl after I was done - now there is no need. Sunday, I made pasta and some fell on the floor - Tasha loved pasta - and there was no one there to pick up what had been dropped.


My mother told me a while ago to make sure that we were the last thing she sees - which I am so glad we were able to do. I know she knew how much I love her and always will. I think it has made this (if possible) for me to deal with. If she passed away in the middle of the night, I never would have been able to say my last goodbye to her. Of that I am very thankful.


She was around for almost 13 years, so she had a full life. She had people that loved her. She lived in two states, six houses, and even flew on a plane! Half of her life was spent in our current home.

I always called her my 'special girl' - which she is and always will be...

Friday, November 13, 2009

TASHA 01/25/97-11/12/09.


Wednesday, we experienced a huge loss. It was necessary to put Tasha to sleep.

While I knew she was getting older, I had been trying to prepare myself for the inevitable. Well, no matter how much you think you can prepare yourself – it’s never enough.

Tasha had been having problems with her spleen. It was enlarged and she was taking antibiotics. Wednesday night, PJ came home and noticed she was having trouble getting up off of the floor to go outside, she went outside and collapsed in the backyard.

We took her to the Emergency Vet Clinic and she most likely ruptured her spleen. They could have done surgery, which was no guarantee and she is almost 13 years old. So, we made the decision. We were right there, all the way through.

Out of this, I’m glad we found her and were able to say goodbye while she was still with us. If I woke up the next morning, I don’t know if I could have handled that.

She was a constant for me, and for PJ too. I know she had an impact on our friends as well. For almost 13 years she was always there, always happy, and a source of happiness for me.

When we came home, there was no dog looking out of the window as we pulled into the driveway. I keep looking over by the front door – where she always laid and she’s not there. I look over to where her food and water bowls were; and the space just looks so empty.

I went through all of the pictures and put every picture I have of her into an album. Looking through it was very hard. There were pictures when I first brought her home as a little puppy, to her laying on the couch/bed/wherever, and outside in the backyard. Very hard to look at.

The shock part is over, I think. Now comes the reality – and it sucks.

If PJ hadn’t been here for me this week, I don’t know what I would do.

They say that time heals all wounds, how long can it take to heal someone who has been with you for that long? How can I fill this void in my heart? We’re going to miss her terribly!
She'll always be my special girl!!









Robby's birthday at Epcot



In order to celebrate Robby's birthday, we all went to the Food and Wine Festival at Epcot.

Good food, good friends, good times!!

Marine Mammal Keepers Experience



For Christmas last year, I gave PJ one of the behind-the-scenes tours at SeaWorld and we finally used it last Friday (it was getting set to expire).


It was a very good program; we saw the animal rehab area, interacted with Otters, dolphins, manatees, seals, walruses, polar bears and beluga whales.


Going to SeaWorld on my day off at 6am wasn't the first thing I wanted to do on my day off, but it was well worth it!!


Thursday, October 15, 2009

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Alaska Cruise


Wow, a 7-day cruise to Alaska. It was the most wonderful experience in the world!! Words can't describe the scenery. You can see a picture of a glacier, but with no reference to its size - you have no idea how big they are.

This glacier is two MILES across and New York City could fit inside of the glacier.

The cruise was incredible!! Well, Saturday there were 20-30 foot seas all day - everyone was sick, dining room was empty (i was fine, PJ not-so-much).


We did some awesome shore excursions and saw reindeer, bald eagles, bears and whales. I not have the nickname of "Tree Hugger" becuase of the zip-line excursion we did (amazing heights, swinging trees and platforms with no railings and 11 people standing around them). I didn;t take any pictures zip-lining, casure you couldn't get between the harness- which the camera was strapped to - and the tree that I was actually hugging.


We stopped in Juneau, Glacier Bay, Sitka, Ketchican and Victoria Canada. I would have liked to have spent more time in Victoria - we were only there for 4 hours and got there at 7pm. All the stops were very pretty scenic cities. I liked Sitka the best, casue they were all just a group of islands.


We spent some time in Seattle as well - and hung out with Greg and Mikel. And in case you were wondering - Washington State controls the sale of liquor. The bottle of rum we buy for $21 was $40 in Washington. Travelling to Seattle should only be made in first class. This is an awesome picture of us coming in for landing in Seattle - that is Mount Ranier, and the plane engine!!:

Awesome trip!! I highly recommend it!






Monday, August 10, 2009

my four-day stay-cation (well...kind of...)

Since I've been forced to switch to part-time at my job, I did reap the benefit this weekend. I had a Friday and a consecutive Monday off of work. A four-day stay-cation. Turned out to be very nice.


On Friday, I did a little job searching and game playing, did the grocery shopping, took some pool water in for it's bi-weekly testing and got ready for a card game that night with friends. PJ was very supries that I made dinner (usually, when we play cards at the house - I don't make dinner. we'll call it time restraints.) Laura, Patrick, Joel, Robby and Mark came over and we played aggrivation - then played a condensed version of dominoes. I didn't realize it, but we finished up at 2:30am (and a bottle and a half of Captain).


Saturday, I hung out in the pool and read. My book is getting real good - and action packed (it was a slow-starter). That afternoon, we went to Aaron and Hubert's house. Hubert is a friend of PJ's from college, and was having a BBQ. There were eight of us and we had a really good time. Turns out all of us are going to see Kathy Griffith this coming Saturday. Aaron made 'white sangria' - as soon as I heard sangria, I was hooked. It was awesome!! White wine with fruit and stuff - but they add vodka!!! How exciting is that!!!??
Sunday was just a chill day. I hung out and read in the pool all day. PJ went up to Paradise in the afternoon and I stayed home and made the BEST chicken Marsala. Oh My Gods!! I have to take my own chef hat off and congratulate myself on an awesome dinner!!
Monday (today), i woke up and reality set in - today was my LAST day of my stay-cation. I hate reality sometimes. This morning I really concentrated in the job search. I had a very good interview with Wet 'n Wild. My desire to find a job with benefits, insurance and health care took precedence today. Instead of going for only Safety jobs, I went for anything. Probably sent out 100 resumes - which is another purpose of the part-time thing at SW.
Tasha is very pissed at me right now. I had to take her back to the Vet to get her stiches removed. Do you know they use real staples? Heck, I could have done that with a staple remover! (kidding Tasha!!)
Well, back to work tomorrow. And I have to wait TWO WEEKS to get only a three day weekend! Reality sucks!!